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The Scotty Love Show: Wife-Speak

Scotty Love and his lovely wife return this week with a lesson on how (not) to love your wife.

Share and enjoy!

LESSON FOUR
Loving Your Wife
Key Scripture: Ephesians 5:25-33

ICE BREAKERS

1. What’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever said to your wife?

2. What words or topics or triggers do you avoid with your wife because you know it’s not a place you want to go?

3. When you’re in the dog house, what’s your go-to move to get out of it?

INTRODUCTION

Have you ever thought that women should come with an instruction manual? How nice would it be to have a booklet or even a cheat sheet to help you interpret every word and action? Never again would you be caught off guard when she’s suddenly mad at you. Never again would you make things worse by asking, “Are you mad at me?” Never again would you get caught in that downward spiral where every thing you say just makes things worse.

Women are not cars, or stereos, or computers, or anything else that comes with a manual. They don’t have warning lights or secret code words. They are different than us in how they think and communicate, and they don’t especially like being analyzed like a piece of electronics. They want to be respected, understood, and loved just as we do.

READ AND DISCUSS

Read Ephesians 6:25-33

How does God want us to love our wives?

Read Romans 5:8

How much did God do for the people he made his church?

Do you think God gave us this parallel to show us how he loves us or to teach us how we should love our wives? Why?

How many of you sacrificed some of your time – guy time – in the last week?

If Ephesians 6 is the standard job description for being a good husband, how do you think your wife would rate your job performance on a scale of 1 to 10?

CHALLENGE

What was it about your wife that first attracted you to her?

When was it that you knew that you wanted to marry your wife? How did you know?

Are you ever reminded of the woman you first fell in love with these days? What triggers you to see her as that same girl you wanted to propose to all those years ago?

What are some things you can do to become better helpers to your wife?

How can you become a better friend and partner to your wife?

Are there things in your relationship that are more likely to trigger fights? Can you think of any strategies to help you avoid negative conflicts (or help others in this group to do so)?

What little sacrifice could you make this week to give her a romantic surprise and (maybe) reminder of the guy she wanted to marry?

Will you do it?

WRAP UP

It doesn’t take much some days to show your wife you love her, but it does require an effort on our parts. Don’t take her for granted. And don’t try to work her like a machine. Remember the wife of your youth (Proverbs 5:18). Remember the vow you made to be her partner. And never be shy about sacrificing for her, just as Jesus did for us.

PRAYER

Dear God,

Forgive us for the times we take our wives for granted. Forgive us for phoning in our marital duties and not paying enough attention to our wives’ needs. Help us to love and cherish them as you loved us, and give us strong marriages so we can withstand the hard times in life.

In Jesus’s name,
Amen

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The Scotty Love Show: Parenting

Ladies and gents, it’s time for your weekly dose of wisdom from the lips of Scotty Love. This week, Scotty and his daughter shed some light on parenting – the wrong way.

The Scotty Love Show is a 12 part video Bible study designed for men’s groups, using humor and Bible study to help men become better leaders, servants, and followers of Christ.

Share and enjoy!

LESSON THREE
Loving Your Kids
Key Scripture: Proverbs 1:8-9, Ephesians 6:4, Proverbs 22:6.

ICE BREAKERS

What’s one of your favorite memories with your Mom or Dad?

Do you remember a time when your parents got really angry with you? What did you do, and how did they handle it?

Did you ever bust your parents doing something they should not have done – or that they would not have let you do? What was it? How did they respond?

INTRODUCTION

Of all the titles you will hold in your life, “father” is far and away the most challenging. It’s also one of the most important. In addition to caring, nurturing, and providing for the physical needs of their children, God gave parents the awesome responsibility of teaching those children to walk in the steps of Jesus.

Teaching kids to follow Jesus isn’t as simple as telling them what to do. You have to model it. Kids are always watching, and when they see a parent who doesn’t practice what they preach, it can kill their faith. Our children need us to teach them God’s Word. They need us to be active in their lives, not lecturing from a distance. And they need us to live the life we want them to emulate – which means we need to live the way Christ taught us to live!

READ AND DISCUSS

Read Proverbs 1:8-9

What does Solomon’s instruction for his son tell us about the job of being a parent?

What instructions does God expect parents to give to their children?

Why did God give this job to parents, and not to teachers or pastors or someone outside the home?

Read Ephesians 6:4

What does it mean to exasperate our children?

What are some of the ways we frustrate our kids with our instructions, rules, and teaching?

Why is it critical for parents to make time for their kids?

Why is living what we preach more important than the preaching part? Do kids learn more from words or actions?

CHALLENGE

Do you remember any instances of your parents telling you, “Do as I say, not as I do?”

Dads: Can you think of any examples of a time when you exasperated your kids, either through your own impatience, anger, or bad example?

How can we address our mistakes with our kids to show them we know we did wrong and want to do better?

Dads: How hard is it to make time to play with your kids?

What are some things you have in common with your children, activities you can do together? If you’re not a parent yet, what are some hobbies you hope to share with your kids?

How can you use that hobby to teach spiritual lessons? Brainstorm together to find ways that fun time can also be a time to build faith.

Are there some areas in your life you need to straighten out so you can be a better example to your kids?

Dads: What steps are you going to make this week to become a better Dad?

Non-Dads: What can you do now to prepare yourself to be the best Dad you can be?

WRAP UP

Your kids are your most important investment – more than any savings or retirement fund or even your old comic book collection. They are the future of the church and the future of this world. As someone once handed their faith down to you, it’s up to you to pass that faith on to your children.

Make time for your kids. Teach them what the Word of God says. Then live it every day. When you mess up, don’t sweep it under the rug. Confess your sin, tell your kids you know you messed up, and let them see a real effort from you to set things right.

Read Proverbs 22:6.

Train your kids by setting the example for them with your life. You may not see it, but they really are paying attention!

PRAYER

Dear God,

Thank you for the gift of children. Forgive us for the times we fail you and our kids. Teach us how to set the example in our homes by living like Christ. Let our kids see a life in us that they will copy as they grow older.

In Jesus’s name,
Amen

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Free Skit About Hosea

I’m a day late, as I try to get these up on Sunday nights, but here is this week’s free skit. This one’s brand new. It’s the one for all of you who have said to yourself, “You know the one thing I can never find is a good skit about the story of Hosea.”

Share and enjoy.

Hosea’s Kids
By John Cosper
www.righteousinsanity.com

THEME: Hosea

CHARACTERS
Jezreel
Not Loved
Not My Kid

Jezreel walks on stage.

JEZREEL: Growing up in Israel, I had friends with normal names and normal meanings. My friend John’s name means God is gracious. My buddy Matthew’s name means Gift of God. My name is Jezreel. Jezreel doesn’t mean anything special like John or Matthew. Jezreel was a battlefield where the wicked King Ahab and his wife Jezebel slaughtered a bunch of God’s prophets. My father was a prophet too, and he gave me that name to tell the people of Israel that they would soon suffer just as the prophets did under Ahab. Dad made his point, but he also made life miserable for me. Elementary school is bad enough without being named for an unfortunate chapter in your country’s history. I thought I had it bad. Then my sister came along.

Not Loved enters.

NOT LOVED: Hi. My name is Not Loved.

JEZREEL: Hey sis.

NOT LOVED: Hey, Jezreel. My name is actually pronounced Lo-Ruhamah, but the kids in school had trouble pronouncing all that. So they called me Not Loved. “Wow, your parents must really hate you!” They told me. “Not Loved! She’s not loved! Hey, who has two thumbs and isn’t loved? That girl! Ha ha ha!” Jezreel had it easy compared to me. But even I had it easy compared to our baby brother.

Not My Kid enters.

NOT MY KID: Hi, my name is… Not My Kid.

JEZREEL/NOT LOVED: Hey, bro.

NOT MY KID: ‘Sup, guys? My full name is Lo-Ammi, but like my sister, the kids preferred to call me by what my name means. Dad was sending a message to Israel. He wanted them to know that he did not love the things they had done. He wanted them to know he had rejected them as his people. I’m sure he and God had good intentions, but it’s pretty rough having a name like Not My Kid! Every day, it was the same thing at after school pick up. “I’m here to get my son. He’s Not My Kid.” Mrs. McKimson was terribly confused.

JEZREEL: Don’t get us wrong. Dad was a really good father. He played with us. He read to us. He took us on hikes. He taught us about God. But we all had a chip on our shoulder because of the names he gave us.

NOT LOVED: Dad told me every night that he loved me. But he named me Not Loved. How am I supposed to deal with that?

NOT MY KID: We all had trouble dealing with our names. It wasn’t easy being living prophecies of doom. We were meant to remind everyone that God’s judgment was coming. Doesn’t make you the most popular kid at the party.

JEZREEL: Then God gave our Dad another message. It was about Mom.

NOT LOVED: Mom wasn’t the good parent Dad was. She definitely wasn’t a good wife. She was unfaithful to Dad almost from the beginning.

NOT MY KID: He knew what kind of person she was before he married her. God told him to marry her, and he listened. He always listened when God spoke.

JEZREEL: It wasn’t a surprise to anyone when Mom left him for other men. But what was a surprise was what Dad did about it.

NOT LOVED: She was put up for sale. Like a slave. Nothing but a piece of property. He bought her, and he brought her home.

NOT MY KID: God had given Dad another message. Yes, Israel had been unfaithful. Yes, he had rejected Israel. But he would not reject Israel forever. God still loved her, and he always would.

JEZREEL: My name is Jezreel. My name reminds people of a terrible thing they did. I have a sister named Not Loved and a brother named Not My Kid. But we have a father who loves us as much as any father ever loved his kids.

NOT LOVED: He loves our Mom, too, and he always will.

NOT MY KID: And as much as he loves us, God loves us more.

JEZREEL: It isn’t easy being the child of a prophet. And it isn’t easy having a rotten name like Jezreel.

NOT LOVED: Or Not Loved.

NOT MY KID: Or Not My Kid.

JEZREEL: But we are forever thankful to be children of God. No matter what happens, we know he will always love us. Just like our dad.

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Scotty Love: The Good Listener

Get to know Scotty Love’s darling wife this week, and get a crash course in how NOT to communicate with your own bride!

Part two of the Scotty Love Videvo Bible Study for Guys.

Share and enjoy!

LESSON TWO
Listen Up!
Key Scripture: Proverbs 18:13, James 1:19, Prov 10:19.

ICE BREAKERS

How many of you can recite your favorite (clean) line from your favorite movie?

How many of you can remember what the pastor preached on last Sunday?

What’s the last thing your wife, boss, roommate or someone said to you before you came here?

INTRODUCTION

There’s a big difference between hearing and listening. Hearing is the physical act of hearing, while listening is the act of giving attention to what we hear. We hear things all the time that we never will remember – dogs, car engines, rain, wind, music, Muzak, and yes, the voices of other people. We have the ability to give these sounds our attention or to tune them out. When we tune out voices that want to be heard, we can get ourselves into big trouble.

Friends, wives, girlfriends, children, doctors and bosses are just some of the people who want us to listen. Failing to listen can cause fractures in a relationship. It can get you in trouble. It can get you fired. It can lead to a night spent on the couch, or, as Scotty Love found out, a very, very expensive credit card bill.

Listening is critical to doing business. It’s also key to good marriages, good friendships, and yes, good small groups. If we want to be the men God wants us to be, we have to pay attention and listen!

READ AND DISCUSS

Can anyone share a recent story of a time you didn’t listen and got yourself in hot water?

Mark Twain once said, “It is better to remain silent and thought a fool than to open one’s mouth and remove all doubt.” How does speaking without listening make us look like a fool?

Why is it important we hear the whole story before we speak?

Why do we tend to start speaking and offer answers before we know the whole story?

Read James 1:19 and Proverbs 10:19

Is there a correlation between speaking too soon and becoming angry?

Have you ever made someone angry because you spoke too soon? Or has someone angered you by failing to hear you out?

What other problems do we create when we fail to listen?

CHALLENGE

Where do you struggle to listen the most: with your family, at work, or at church?

How do you think social media has changed the way we listen? Do we “listen” better or worse online?

Sometimes we don’t hear people who want us to listen because we are distracted. They hit us up when we are busy doing something else, or when we don’t have time to chat. How often does this cause listeng problems for you?

Do you think you can be a good listener while you are doing other things?

What other factors/situations can you think of that lead to people not hearing one another?

How can you eliminate distractions or otherwise improve your ability to listen to others when they want to talk?

What other habits do you need to change in order to become a better listener?

When is it okay to speak up and give answers or advice to someone who needs it?

How can we respond when we don’t have the answers?

WRAP UP

If we want to become better listeners, we need to plan ahead. We need to discover the things that keep us from listening, and we need strategies to help us eliminate those distractions. When someone needs to talk, we need to give them our attention – not just our ears, but eye contact. We need to stop work if we can, or ask if it can wait a minute. If it can wait, we need to get to a stopping point and give the attention that’s needed.

Failure to communicate rarely happens because people aren’t speaking. It happens because someone isn’t listening. Don’t miss an opportunity to love someone because you’re too distracted to hear them out. Stop and listen. Let them finish. Then speak only when necessary. Sometimes just listening is enough.

PRAYER

Dear God,

Forgive us for the way we run our mouths. Forgive us for being bad listeners. Teach us to stop and listen when someone needs our ear, and give us the wisdom to know when to answer, and when to stay silent.

In Jesus’s name,
Amen

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Free Skit – Spread the Seed

Hasn’t happened in a while, but it did today. Heard a new insight in an old Bible story this morning in church, and that insight led to a new monologue.

Spread some seed this week, wherever you are.

Share and enjoy.

Spread the Seed
By John Cosper
www.righteousinsanity.com

THEME: Parable of the Sower

CHARACTERS
Millie – A city woman now living on a farm (Monologue)

Millie enters, looking like Eva Gabor from Green Acres.

It was just about a year ago, Harry came home from work with this big, dopey grin on his face. “I did it! “ he says. “I finally did it!”

“You did what?” I ask him.

“I quit my job,” he says. “I sold the apartment. I bought us a farm in Upstate. We move in a month.”

“Are you kidding me?” I say. “You? On a farm? What are you gonna do on a farm?”

He tells me we’re gonna live off the land. We’re gonna raise crops. We’re gonna sell ‘em at the local market, barter for the things we need, and farewell to the things we don’t. Department store credit cards. Valet parking. Reddit. It’s all gotta go.

I says to him, “Harry, valet and Reddit I can do without. But what makes you think you got the green thumb? The only plants we ever had were two plastic palms, and you killed ‘em both!”

Well, there’s no arguing with Harry when he sets his mind to something. A month later, we say goodbye to the city. We move out to a thirty acre farm outside Corning. Day one, he gets up, puts on bib overalls and a straw hat like he’s Old MacDonald. He finds this patch of dirt and starts tossing corn out on the ground.

“How do you know the corn’s gonna grow there?” I ask. “You never farmed a day in your life!”

He tells me, “This is the good soil! It’s gotta grow here!”

I look around and see a patch of weeds growing by an old water pump. I see a gravel pile by the barn, and a driveway leading to the garage.

“Harry,” I says, “I bet you I can grow more seeds in the weeds, the rocks, and the driveway than you can!”

“Ha!” he says. “You can’t sow seed there!” But he humors me. He gives me a fist full of corn. So I drop some in the weeds. I spread some on the gravel. I toss some on the driveway.

Six months later, wouldn’t you know who won the pony? Harry’s corn sprouted all right, but a bunch of rabbits showed up in July and ate them down to the ground. Meanwhile I get two dozen ears from the corn sown in the weeds and four dozen from the gravel. I woulda had a bunch more on the driveway, but that deadbeat dad of his shows up Fourth of July and parks his RV over my crop for the next month.

Just last week, Bentley Mains, our Sunday School teacher in our little country church, was talking about the sower planting seed. He spread some in the rocks, some in the weeds, some on the path, and some in the good soil. “We all gotta be good soil,” he says. “So God can grow in our hearts.”

Judy Finch, our neighbor down in the holler, asks him, “If God wants us to be good soil, why did the sower toss seed in the weeds and the rocks and on the path?”

I smiled and told her, “Because sometimes, they surprise you. Sometimes the seed grows in the weeds. Sometimes it grows in the gravel. Sometimes it grows on the driveway. God wants us to be generous with where we sow, because it might be difficult to grow in the weeds, but it’s not impossible.”

It’s planting season, and Harry’s out there again. He tilled the soil. He fertilized it. He put a fence around it. Maybe he’ll get a good crop out of the good soil this season. I’ve already sown my crop in the weeds, in the rocks, and on the path. Maybe I won’t get lucky again, but I did it to remind myself that we need to sow seed everywhere. Be generous where you sow. Sometimes God will surprise you, and sometimes even the seed sown on the driveway will grow. You just need a little sun, a little prayer, and a couple saw horses to keep your father-in-law from parking on your corn all summer long.

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Scotty Love: Small Groups

The Scotty Love Show was conceived as a video Bible study for guys, especially guys who might not be used to the small group or Bible study atmosphere. The idea was to present a skit or video in which the host of the Scotty Love show discusses a topic relevant to Christian men – poorly. Afterwards, the guys in the group dig into the Bible and some discussion time to seek some real answers. It’s an ideal program for young adult men, or a mixed age group, as Scotty’s guests include older and younger male friends, not to mention his sassy wife and unflappable daughter.

Week one of the series is, appropriately enough: Small Groups.

Here’s episode one. Bible study is below the video.

Share and enjoy!

Iron Sharpens Iron
Key Scripture: Proverbs 27:7, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

ICE BREAKERS

What is your favorite sports team?

What is the greatest action movie of all time?

What is the funniest movie of all time?

INTRODUCTION

Guys are not naturals when it comes to opening up. We don’t go to the bathroom in groups to talk about our dates. Guys don’t call guys just to say, “Whatcha doin’?” Guys don’t meet over coffee, and they never, ever talk about “feelings.”

God doesn’t want us to keep it all to ourselves. If he did, he wouldn’t have gifted women with the ability to make us open up when we don’t feel like talking. But God doesn’t want us to stop there. He wants us to band together as men to encourage, support, and strengthen one another.

Being part of a small group is a serious commitment, but a small group demands all of its members to make that commitment in order to succeed. We need to commit ourselves to listen, to share, and maybe most important – to keep it in the group.

READ AND DISCUSS

Read Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

What benefits does Solomon give for working together instead of going it alone?

How often do you undertake a task that would be better done with two people?

Why do you think we choose to do those jobs on our own?

Have you ever had any disasters – small or large – because you didn’t ask for help? What happened?

Read Prov 27:17

How have you been “sharpened” by mentors – teachers, coaches, pastors, bosses – in your life?

How have you been sharpened by peers in your life?

What other benefits have you experienced working with or playing on a team vs. going alone?

CHALLENGE

Why did you decide to join a small group?

How do you expect to be “sharpened” by being in this group?

What fears do you have about being in a small group?

What expectations do you have for this group, and for your fellow group members?

How nervous are you about sharing things that are going on in your life?

The first rule of Fight Club is you don’t talk about Fight Club. The same rule has to apply to a small group. How can we create a safe environment where guys can be heard without worrying that what is said here will leave this room?

What other questions or concerns do you have that you’d like to address as we begin our small group studies together?

WRAP UP

Whatever your expectations are coming into this group, one thing is certain: we will get out of it what we put in. If we put on fronts and refuse to be honest with each other, we will never become sharper. If we betray the trust required to make this group a success, we will fall apart. But if we are genuinely open and honest with one another, there’s no limit to what God can do with our group.

Let’s ask God to bless the time we spend together. Let’s pray for the courage to open up and be real. And let’s ask God to use each of us to sharpen one another.

PRAYER

Dear God,

Thank you for bringing each one of us to this group. I pray that you will use this group to encourage and inspire every member. Help us to build the trust we need to hold each other accountable and build each other up.

In Jesus’s name,
Amen

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Free Skit – A Wacky Little Devil

Sorry it’s been a while since I posted a freebie. This is a classic, and a reminder what a devious enemy we have.

I’ve also posted a video of the skit on YouTube below the script.

Share and enjoy.

A Wacky Little Devil
By John Cosper
www.righteousinsanity.com

THEME: Satan

CHARACTERS
Glen and Mike – Young guys, roommates
Satan- Their “wacky” roommate
Laura – A smart girl

AUTHOR’S NOTE: It’s nothing new that the devil has become a parody in our society. It’s also no secret to those who are in Christ that this is exactly the way he wants it. If there’s nothing (and no one) to fear, then why does a person need Jesus? Satan wins by making himself a joke. We as Christians need to remember – and remind others of – the term Peter used to describe him: the enemy.

A counter is stage right. A desk with a swivel chair is stage left. Satan, in a red suit and horns and tail, sits in the swivel chair, facing upstage. Glen is at the counter with an empty box of cereal, trying to pour some. Mike enters.

GLEN: Mike, how many times do I have to tell you? Don’t eat the last of my cereal and put the empty box back!
MIKE: I didn’t eat your cereal!
GLEN: You didn’t?
MIKE: You know I hate that cereal. It’s disgusting.
GLEN: Well if you didn’t eat it, and I didn’t eat it, who did?

Both guys sigh.

GLEN/MIKE: Satan!

Satan swivels around. He laughs.

SATAN: (doing a Paul Lynde impression) Oh, I am such a devil!

A catching theme song plays.
 
JINGLE: He’s a naughty little devil and that’s a fact.
A little bit silly and kinda wacked.
He’ll make you laugh on a gloomy day
He’s the devil, he’s the devil, and he’s okay!

Song ends.

GLEN: Satan, did you eat my cereal and put the box back?
SATAN: I cannot tell a lie. Oh who am I kidding? I’m the father of lies.
GLEN: You know I need my breakfast in the morning!
SATAN: I’m sorry, Glen. The devil made me do it.
MIKE: You are the devil.
SATAN: I know. Aren’t I a naughty boy?
GLEN: Whatever. I’ll grab a donut on my way in.
SATAN: Have a good day, Glen!
MIKE: Bye.

Glen exits.
 
MIKE: Now, Satan, my new girlfriend is coming by. You promise not to embarrass me?
SATAN: Mike, when have I ever embarrassed you?
MIKE: Well, there was the time you switched my Coke with rum at grandma’s birthday. And the time you got me to date two girls at once and they found out about it. And graduation night.
SATAN: Ohh, did I do that?
MIKE: Look, just promise to be nice, will ya?
SATAN: And if I do, what do I get in return?
MIKE: What do you want?
SATAN: Oh, I dunno… Your eternal soul? (wacky laugh) Ha ha ha ha.

There’s a knock on the door.

MIKE: Okay, fine, have my soul. Just don’t embarrass me.
SATAN: You won’t even know I’m here.

Satan exits. Mike answers the door. Laura enters.

MIKE: Hey, honey.
LAURA: Morning. Looks like someone forgot to shower.
MIKE: I just got back from my run.
LAURA: Mike, this is a nice place.
MIKE: Thanks.
LAURA: Did you decorate this yourself?
MIKE: No, my roommate did.
LAURA: Glen? He decorated this?
MIKE: No, not him. My other roommate.
LAURA: You keep mentioning this other roommate, but you don’t say much about him. Is he here?
MIKE: I think he went out.

There’s a loud crash off stage.

LAURA: What was that?
MIKE: Oh, that must be Glen in the kitchen.
LAURA: That can’t be. I saw Glen on his way downstairs. Looked like he was in a hurry too.

Another loud banging.

LAURA: Is that the third guy?
MIKE: Yeah, I guess it is him.
LAURA: Well can I meet him?
MIKE: Oh, you don’t want to meet him.
LAURA: Yes I do!
MIKE: Really, he’s a bit anti-social. And he smells bad. I mean like sulfur.
LAURA: Come on, it can’t be that bad.

Satan enters with two plates of chocolate cake.

SATAN: Good morning, kids. Anyone care for a Me-Food Cake?
MIKE: Oh no.
LAURA: What kind of cake is it?
SATAN: Me-Food. Oh, excuse me, I believe you would call it Devil’s Food. Ha ha ha ha. (slaps Mike on the arm) Well go on, ya big palooka. Introduce us!
MIKE: Laura, this is my roommate Lucifer.
LAURA: Lucifer?
SATAN: Lucifer. Satan. The Devil. When you get to know me better, you can call me by my old college nickname, Scooter.
LAURA: Your roommate is the devil?
SATAN: (nudging Mike) Only when he forgets to clean the bathroom. Ha ha ha. Just joking. He’s no devil. I am.
LAURA: But… but THE devil?
SATAN: In the third degree burned flesh. (hands a plate of cake to Laura) You want some milk to go with that cake?
LAURA: I, uh…
SATAN: Wait right here.

Satan runs off.

MIKE: Sorry, I wanted to prepare you for–
LAURA: That’s the devil.
MIKE: Yep.
LAURA: Lucifer. Satan. Hades!
MIKE: Yeah, that’s Scooter.
LAURA: Mike, how long have you been living with the devil?
MIKE: I dunno, four years, maybe five?
LAURA: Don’t you know he’s dangerous?
MIKE: You’re kidding, right?
SATAN: (off stage) Hey, who drank all of my Slim Fasts?
MIKE: I’ll admit, he’s a little eccentric. He’s got a morbid sense of humor. (beat) And he’s a filthy liar. But you’ve met the guy. He’s harmless as a kitten.
LAURA: You don’t get it, do you? He makes you think he’s this sweet, cuddly guy, lures you into a false sense of security – and them bam! He hits you when you least expect it.
MIKE: With what, his copy of The Lake House?

Satan enters with a glass of milk.

SATAN: Oh, I know you’re not making fun of my favorite book again.
MIKE: No, never.
SATAN: Here you go, honey.

Laura takes the milk.

LAURA: Thank – oh wow, it’s hot.
SATAN: Again? Darn. That walk from the fridge to hear is just too far. I can’t ever seem to serve anything cold. Remember that ice cream bar at Glen’s birthday?
MIKE: How could I forget? The carpet cleaning cost over three thousand bucks.
SATAN: Lucky for you, Glen had the money to pay for it. Even luckier, he sold me his soul to get the money to pay for it.

Satan exits, giggling.

MIKE: He’s a card, isn’t he?

Laura sets down the cake and glass and grabs Mike’s arm.

LAURA: Mike, you need to get out with me. Now!
MIKE: Laura, this is my place.
LAURA: And you’re in grave danger as long as that thing is around.
SATAN: (off) Hey, who’s been using my Paula Deen cookbook? It didn’t walk off by itself!
MIKE: Yeah, he’s real dangerous.
LAURA: Fine. You stay here and see what happens. I’m leaving.

Laura storms for the door.

MIKE: Come on, Laura. (standing) Laura, wait!

Mike exits after her. Satan enters.

SATAN: I’m gonna fix some salad for lunch. How many should I…

Satan sees everyone is gone. There’s a squeal of tires off stage. Satan rushes to the window and looks out. He then walks to the desk and the phone, and picks up the phone.

SATAN: (drops the Paul Lynde act; very serious, business-like) It’s me. The first one should be down any second. Expect the other one by dinner. You know what to do.

Blackout.

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Desperately Seeking… God’s Best

Part six, the final chapter (for now) of Desperately Seeking.

Share and enjoy.

First Impressions

What do you think of Jenny?

What are some good things we can say about Jenny?

Is there anything that concerns you about Jenny?

 

Introduction

Jenny really is interested in finding God’s best, isn’t she? She’s read the books, and she’s looking for God to give her all of the good things in life. There’s just one problem: God has already given us his best. He’s given us Jesus. Jesus came not to give us wealth and good health. He came to give us the best blessing of all: our salvation.

Too many believers are focused on what God can do for them. Not enough are concerned with what they can do to serve the Lord. Jesus died for us. He’s given far more than we could ever earn or deserve.

The Christian life isn’t about what we can get from God. It’s about how we can give back. We can never give enough to equal what Jesus has done, but we can use our time, our gifts, and the blessings God has given us to serve the Lord and serve other people.

 

Read Matthew 20:20-28

Why do you think James and John’s mother asked Jesus for a favor?

How did Jesus respond to her request?

Jesus said that whomever wants to be the greatest has to be the servant of all. How did Jesus live out this command?

Does anyone know how James and John ultimately lived out their lives? (James was martyred, as were nine other disciples. John was repeatedly jailed and tortured for Christ and was even dipped in boiling oil. He died of natural causes in exile.)

 

Application

Why do you think people are drawn to teachers who tell them that God wants to give them riches and blessings?

Do teachings like the so-called prosperity gospel do more to help or hurt the cause of Christ?

What would you say to someone like Jenny about God’s best?

What advice would you give to someone who wanted God’s best life right now?

 

Prayer

Dear Jesus,

Forgive us for the times we treat you like a blessing machine. Help us remember all Jesus as done for us. Teach us to be servants so we can live the life you have planned for us.

In Jesus’ name,
Amen

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Desperately Seeking… Compatibility

Does Christian genre fiction have groupies? Like the Trekkies? Let’s hope this is just fiction.

Part 5 of Desperately Seeking, our video Bible study for singles. Share and enjoy.

First Impressions

What do you think of Doug?

What are some good things we can say about Doug?

If he asked, would you go to the movies with Doug?

 

Introduction

Regardless of what you may think about his taste in movies and literature, we’re all a little like Doug. Some of us love science fiction and comic books. Some are sports fans. Some like art and classical music. And some people can’t get enough of professional wrestling.

Finding things in common with a mate is important, but what commonalities are most important? As Christians we need to be seeking people who are like-minded in their faith. We need to find someone who shares our values so that we can live out our faith and pass it on to our children.

The focus of this series on making the most of our single days, but that doesn’t mean we can’t do that with an eye to the future. Learn now what’s most important to you in a husband or wife. Make your list of intangibles, and don’t compromise those in the slightest. There are worse things than being single, and being “unequally yoked” is one.

 

Read 2 Corinthians 6:14-18

What does it mean to be yoked? (Feel free to have someone Google this question if need be!)

Why does Paul caution against being unequally yoked?

Why would being married to an unbeliever be hard?

How would marrying an unbeliever make raising children who love Jesus difficult?

 

Application

What are some things you simply couldn’t live with in a mate? Is there anything that’s come up in a past relationship, even something small, that you just couldn’t live with? (This doesn’t have to be a serious thing; it can be small or funny.)

Have any of you ever tried “missionary dating,” dating someone to try to lead them to Christ? How did that work out for you?

Is there value in knowing what you can and can’t live with in a mate before dating?

Have each person in the group come up with a list of five things they think are most important in a mate. Share your lists, and see if you can come up with a master list.

 

Prayer

Dear Jesus,

Make us wise as look for your will in our lives. Help us to cling to what’s most important so that we won’t compromise our faith. Bless us with godly spouses who build us up in Christ.

In Jesus’ name,
Amen