Sorry it’s been a while since I posted a freebie. This is a classic, and a reminder what a devious enemy we have.
I’ve also posted a video of the skit on YouTube below the script.
Share and enjoy.
A Wacky Little Devil
By John Cosper
Glen and Mike – Young guys, roommates
Satan- Their “wacky” roommate
Laura – A smart girl
AUTHOR’S NOTE: It’s nothing new that the devil has become a parody in our society. It’s also no secret to those who are in Christ that this is exactly the way he wants it. If there’s nothing (and no one) to fear, then why does a person need Jesus? Satan wins by making himself a joke. We as Christians need to remember – and remind others of – the term Peter used to describe him: the enemy.
A counter is stage right. A desk with a swivel chair is stage left. Satan, in a red suit and horns and tail, sits in the swivel chair, facing upstage. Glen is at the counter with an empty box of cereal, trying to pour some. Mike enters.
GLEN: Mike, how many times do I have to tell you? Don’t eat the last of my cereal and put the empty box back!
MIKE: I didn’t eat your cereal!
GLEN: You didn’t?
MIKE: You know I hate that cereal. It’s disgusting.
GLEN: Well if you didn’t eat it, and I didn’t eat it, who did?
Both guys sigh.
Satan swivels around. He laughs.
SATAN: (doing a Paul Lynde impression) Oh, I am such a devil!
A catching theme song plays.
JINGLE: He’s a naughty little devil and that’s a fact.
A little bit silly and kinda wacked.
He’ll make you laugh on a gloomy day
He’s the devil, he’s the devil, and he’s okay!
GLEN: Satan, did you eat my cereal and put the box back?
SATAN: I cannot tell a lie. Oh who am I kidding? I’m the father of lies.
GLEN: You know I need my breakfast in the morning!
SATAN: I’m sorry, Glen. The devil made me do it.
MIKE: You are the devil.
SATAN: I know. Aren’t I a naughty boy?
GLEN: Whatever. I’ll grab a donut on my way in.
SATAN: Have a good day, Glen!
MIKE: Now, Satan, my new girlfriend is coming by. You promise not to embarrass me?
SATAN: Mike, when have I ever embarrassed you?
MIKE: Well, there was the time you switched my Coke with rum at grandma’s birthday. And the time you got me to date two girls at once and they found out about it. And graduation night.
SATAN: Ohh, did I do that?
MIKE: Look, just promise to be nice, will ya?
SATAN: And if I do, what do I get in return?
MIKE: What do you want?
SATAN: Oh, I dunno… Your eternal soul? (wacky laugh) Ha ha ha ha.
There’s a knock on the door.
MIKE: Okay, fine, have my soul. Just don’t embarrass me.
SATAN: You won’t even know I’m here.
Satan exits. Mike answers the door. Laura enters.
MIKE: Hey, honey.
LAURA: Morning. Looks like someone forgot to shower.
MIKE: I just got back from my run.
LAURA: Mike, this is a nice place.
LAURA: Did you decorate this yourself?
MIKE: No, my roommate did.
LAURA: Glen? He decorated this?
MIKE: No, not him. My other roommate.
LAURA: You keep mentioning this other roommate, but you don’t say much about him. Is he here?
MIKE: I think he went out.
There’s a loud crash off stage.
LAURA: What was that?
MIKE: Oh, that must be Glen in the kitchen.
LAURA: That can’t be. I saw Glen on his way downstairs. Looked like he was in a hurry too.
Another loud banging.
LAURA: Is that the third guy?
MIKE: Yeah, I guess it is him.
LAURA: Well can I meet him?
MIKE: Oh, you don’t want to meet him.
LAURA: Yes I do!
MIKE: Really, he’s a bit anti-social. And he smells bad. I mean like sulfur.
LAURA: Come on, it can’t be that bad.
Satan enters with two plates of chocolate cake.
SATAN: Good morning, kids. Anyone care for a Me-Food Cake?
MIKE: Oh no.
LAURA: What kind of cake is it?
SATAN: Me-Food. Oh, excuse me, I believe you would call it Devil’s Food. Ha ha ha ha. (slaps Mike on the arm) Well go on, ya big palooka. Introduce us!
MIKE: Laura, this is my roommate Lucifer.
SATAN: Lucifer. Satan. The Devil. When you get to know me better, you can call me by my old college nickname, Scooter.
LAURA: Your roommate is the devil?
SATAN: (nudging Mike) Only when he forgets to clean the bathroom. Ha ha ha. Just joking. He’s no devil. I am.
LAURA: But… but THE devil?
SATAN: In the third degree burned flesh. (hands a plate of cake to Laura) You want some milk to go with that cake?
LAURA: I, uh…
SATAN: Wait right here.
Satan runs off.
MIKE: Sorry, I wanted to prepare you for–
LAURA: That’s the devil.
LAURA: Lucifer. Satan. Hades!
MIKE: Yeah, that’s Scooter.
LAURA: Mike, how long have you been living with the devil?
MIKE: I dunno, four years, maybe five?
LAURA: Don’t you know he’s dangerous?
MIKE: You’re kidding, right?
SATAN: (off stage) Hey, who drank all of my Slim Fasts?
MIKE: I’ll admit, he’s a little eccentric. He’s got a morbid sense of humor. (beat) And he’s a filthy liar. But you’ve met the guy. He’s harmless as a kitten.
LAURA: You don’t get it, do you? He makes you think he’s this sweet, cuddly guy, lures you into a false sense of security – and them bam! He hits you when you least expect it.
MIKE: With what, his copy of The Lake House?
Satan enters with a glass of milk.
SATAN: Oh, I know you’re not making fun of my favorite book again.
MIKE: No, never.
SATAN: Here you go, honey.
Laura takes the milk.
LAURA: Thank – oh wow, it’s hot.
SATAN: Again? Darn. That walk from the fridge to hear is just too far. I can’t ever seem to serve anything cold. Remember that ice cream bar at Glen’s birthday?
MIKE: How could I forget? The carpet cleaning cost over three thousand bucks.
SATAN: Lucky for you, Glen had the money to pay for it. Even luckier, he sold me his soul to get the money to pay for it.
Satan exits, giggling.
MIKE: He’s a card, isn’t he?
Laura sets down the cake and glass and grabs Mike’s arm.
LAURA: Mike, you need to get out with me. Now!
MIKE: Laura, this is my place.
LAURA: And you’re in grave danger as long as that thing is around.
SATAN: (off) Hey, who’s been using my Paula Deen cookbook? It didn’t walk off by itself!
MIKE: Yeah, he’s real dangerous.
LAURA: Fine. You stay here and see what happens. I’m leaving.
Laura storms for the door.
MIKE: Come on, Laura. (standing) Laura, wait!
Mike exits after her. Satan enters.
SATAN: I’m gonna fix some salad for lunch. How many should I…
Satan sees everyone is gone. There’s a squeal of tires off stage. Satan rushes to the window and looks out. He then walks to the desk and the phone, and picks up the phone.
SATAN: (drops the Paul Lynde act; very serious, business-like) It’s me. The first one should be down any second. Expect the other one by dinner. You know what to do.